Pursuing romance with purpose should plan and take creativity. Sometimes we all feel that we lack both.
In Joshua Harris’ Boy meets Girl, he cited eight courtship conversations wherein you can use what seems helpful and set aside what doesn’t.
These eight conversations practically used when you and your partner are in the stage of “getting to know each other” and helps you to grow closer and enjoy yourselves.
Courtship Conversation # 1 The story of Me
The Date: Each person gets one evening to share his or her baby book or other photos and reminisce about his or her story from arrival to now.
The Conversation: Discuss best memories, worst memories, old friends, and teachers. Use the questions as prompters to get to know each other before you met.
Tips: some of us have had less than happy childhoods. Do not pressures for more or deeper information than the others want to share. This should be a fun time, so far as possible. Emphasize the positive and celebrate God’s hand at work in and through your pasts.
Courtship Conversation # 2 Who’s Cooking Tonight?
The Date: Trade evenings, probably at least a week apart. Your assignment includes planning the menu, shopping, table-setting, cooking and clean-up. The meal can be simple or as splendid as you wish. The purpose is to have fun and stimulate as good conversation, not to compete for top chef honors.
The Conversation: Use this date to talk about your past experiences and current expectations when it comes to gender roles as they relate to household duties.
Tips: You might want to save the discussion for after dinner (don’t distract the cook)
Courtship Conversation # 3 Do you boggle?
The Date: Play a competitive game with some high stakes attached. If you can’t agree on the game, play his and then hers.
The Conversation: Discuss competitiveness and attitudes toward winning. Also, what is the history of family fun and games for each person?
Tips: Games that reveal the most about how we play of compete are those that leave a lot open to interpretation.
Courtship Conversation # 4 Sunday Morning Surprise
The Date: Visit a Church that takes a significantly different approach from one you’re both used to. Then go for lunch or coffee to talk.
The Conversation: Discuss worship styles, core beliefs and God’s purpose for the church.
Courtship Conversation # 5 It Takes Two
The Date: Come up with a craft or building a project that requires the two of you to work closely together within a limited time failure.
The Conversation: Discuss how you each like to approach a complex task or creative challenge.
Tips: approach the project with no predetermined leader or decision maker. See what roles to naturally fall into, and notice how the process unfolds. That’s part of the fun.
Courtship Conversation # 6 Kids On the Loose
The Date: Babysit for a family with plenty of children. Make sure it includes their dinner and getting them all to bed.
The Conversation: Soon after this date, get together to discuss the experience, share your history regarding parenting styles and your views about raising kids,
Tips: Follow up on answers until you’ve covered all the key implications.
Courtship Conversation # 7 Show mw the Money
The Date: Decide together where you can get the best dinner for two for under 500 pesos.
The Conversation: Discuss your parent’s financial priorities, how you approach budgeting and money, and what you hope for down the road.
Tips: Try to be as honest as possible about this difficult issue.
Courtship Conversation # 8 Still Going Strong
The Date: Go to lunch or dinner with a long time married couple.
The Conversation: What are their secrets to success? What do they regret? Later, discuss on what you have learned.
Tips: Talk together before the dinner about the kinds of questions you’d like to ask and feel comfortable broaching.
Aside from these eight courtship conversation, you can take these three simple suggestions.
Talking. Communication is very important in a relationship. It is useful and helpful to nourish the relationship you have. There is no need to force the person to answer your question if he or she does not want to. Both of you must respect each other.
Leading. Gentleman should serve by taking the lead in making these times happen. Be the host who’s making sure that your times and talks together are progressing well and that you’re both having fun.
Listening. Remember to listen well not just with your ear but with your whole being. Conversation isn’t really happening when there’s too much talking and less listening. It should be balance and that’s a way of showing respect to someone who you are with.
The most important thing is that you enjoy everything both of you are sharing.
by: Karen Balmes BJ 3-1d
